Air

Untitled

Today was warm enough to open my window for a while. I sat down in a pile of clean sheets at the sunny end of my bed to read a Weberian analysis of French Catholicism and to feel the fresh air and light on my face and arms. I cannot wait until it is warm enough to leave the window open through the night.

One of my favorite memories from my childhood: night, in bed, reading on my stomach by a small light. I slept on the lower bunk and our bed faced the window which faced westward, with the ocean in sight during the day. Many evenings it would be open a few inches letting in the dark sky's wind and the noise of traffic, and I could feel the sweet cool west-coming air on my face but the rest of me would be wrapped up in a blanket. I told my mother then how much I loved this, and she said, I think, perhaps because when I was a baby and awake at night she would hold me bundled up by the open window like that.

Week in photos (63-69)

63/365
63/365. Mail.

64/365
64/365. Beautiful angles in black-and-snow.

65/365
65/365. Button-down shadows.

66/365
66/365. Now is a cranny-stretch between winter and spring.

67/365
67/365. West.

68/365
68/365. On my bike.

69/365
69/365. Into Chicago.

Pellucid



Mirrors for eyes and windows instead of souls. Her Elisa is right: it takes nothing to see.

This is for my Australians and New Zealanders [astronomy lulz]

"Even those who could accept the sphericity of the Earth [in late antiquity and the early Middle Ages] often had problems with the existence of people at the antipodes. Frequently, those who grudgingly admitted this last possibility were inclined to add that such beings would not be descended from Adam, would be beyond redemption, and by walking with their heads below their feet would be incapable of rational thought."

- my cosmology textbook.

For this spring, a single volume of poetry

I bought a book yesterday. I don't do this often, so when I do I feel like an actor in a beautiful movie. The cashier said, "Her books have the best titles. I can't think of that, ah, what is that one..." But when I was walking out the door, she called after me, "A Wild Patience Has Taken Me This Far!"

My mom told me that when she was newly moved to the city and had half a Victorian flat and not much money, she would walk to the grocery store and buy yogurt for herself once a week as a treat. I thought this was weird and mildly pathetic when I was a teenager; what kind of life is it if a container of yogurt is a luxury?

But: trees dropping apples which change their minds and end up not falling so far. I'm older and have decided that simplicity is not only more enjoyable but also more interesting and substantial than decadence. And for breakfast once every other week or so—I have Greek yogurt. Sweetened with honey. By virtue of being set against a landscape of oatmeal and of being anticipated and bought just one at a time, it does become a luxury. I savor it so, just as my mother must have.

Week in photos (56-62)

56/365
56/365. getting lost in puddles.

57/365
57/365. I woke up to a cupcake outside my door.

58/365
58/365. polka-dot tights

59/365
59/365. the Thai royal family?

60/365
60/365. my professor pushed the windows open.

61/365
61/365. stairwell lightwell.

62/365
62/365. hot water, mint, and honey. in glasses like she used.

In snowmelt

(Setting: Winter
is fading,
and the world
is pale.)

Belief: "If I do everything right, then I'll be all right."

Assess: Then and only then?
I AM all right (yes?); keep being all right?
Or is it feeling all right?

Describe: Like snow melting into a flood somewhere,
a buzzing optimistic energy that turns into
dread, a tense invisible crawling under the skin,
inside the lungs

Fear: What will happen when I can't/don't manage to balance everything?

Elements: If I go to bed early enough and wake up early enough, if I don't fall asleep in the afternoon, if I eat my vegetables and take my supplements and meds and keep my sectioned to-do list and turn everything in on time, if I write my letters and emails, if I keep my room clean, if I do my laundry and go to yoga and do cardio too, if I keep up with my daily assignments and also stick to a good time frame of researching and outlining for the papers and projects that are due at mid-term and the end of the semester, if I turn my library books in and pay my credit card bill, if I don't eat trans fats or soy protein isolate or buy mushrooms that come in styrofoam, if I apply early enough for enough summer jobs and internships, if I buy only used clothing and donate to charity, if I wash my dishes and drink enough water, if I go to church on Sundays and socialize outside of class, if I don't spend more money than I make, if if if/then...

(then I won't get depressed ever again.
then I'll be happy and undiagnosable.
then I'll get good grades,
and a good job for the rest of 2011,
and never have cause to stress or fear again.)
(please tell me this is right.)


Historical analysis: I think I sometimes drop everything on purpose, just to prove to myself that __________.

Strangers, circa 1963

I found these prints at a scavenging center back home. Two are dated 1963; the rest are unmarked. They were in a basket with a note that said, "For anyone who will treasure them as I no longer do."























Week in photos (52-55)

As my replacement memory card arrived on Thursday, we now resume our scheduled Sunday programming.

55/365
55/365. My friend Kathryn and her Sunday necklace.

54/365
54/365. Morning tea by the heater with my Chicago girl who came to visit.

53/365
53/365. The 1940's Christian romance novel that I just finished. Terrible but nice.

52/365
52/365. On winter afternoons, it is blue outside and golden inside.

Featured artist: Jeremias Carroza



It is my pleasure to introduce you to Jeremias Carroza, also known on flickr as laness. Won't you have a look at this flickr gallery I've made of my absolute favorites of his photos?

Who are you?
I would also like to know that answer.

I feel like I am in a long process of getting to know myself, though I know it's a need in my growing and maturing stage I am continuously experiencing.

Superficially speaking, I am Jeremias, a 21-year-old guy currently living in London and finishing a classical piano and music technology degree.

I born in a small town near Barcelona called Calella where my present dreams and expectations started to take shape.

Why do you take pictures?
The reason why I take them today is a bit different to why I took them years ago.

I had my very first camera when I was sixteen years old, though I always loved taking pictures (using my father's camera).

All I did with that first camera was create memories about everything my life was experiencing. But I never understood photography in any deeper way.

A year ago, I was doing my Saturday walk around the local charity shops where I live and bought my first film camera (Canon A35F) for ten pounds. The lack of money made it all. The fact that I had to decide whether it was worth it or not to take my camera out for, made me realise beauty was hidden behind the superficial. The fact that I am broke would make me think whether that shadow is worth it or not to take my camera out my bag and capture it (developing here is quite expensive so I can't really take photos of everything I see/want to).With the time and those decisions, I have experienced beauty behind things I would have never looked into before. It is like I have learnt to see things in a deeper way...

Today's reason of why do I take pictures is a need I have; sometimes I would not care about being late to uni and would let myself fall in love with fog [see here & here]. There is something inside myself that needs to capture those moments. It is not even questionable.

How would you describe your style?
I don't know and in fact, I think I have never thought about it.

What are your tools of choice?
I have a few film cameras that I have been buying and getting from different places (most of them from charity shops) but my favourite camera is and will always be my Canon A35F. I feel very attached to it and it's always with me.

I am not really into types of film; most of my photos have been taken with Kodak 200 as that was the film I was getting for free when developing at the local shop. Lately, I have also been using expired Kodak film that I found on the internet.

What is one piece of creative advice that has been helpful to you?
I have always had in mind what my parents used to tell me: "Do not care what others say about you."

I think it is important to ask for feedback and accept criticism about your work. On the other hand I think it is also important to keep your ideas fresh and pure in order to let inspiration be alive.

What advice would you give to someone who wants to improve their photography?
Photography is very personal so I would recommend that anyone who likes photography should find their own way to express themselves through it and to enjoy it regardless of what other people think.

Thank you, Jeremias.
You can see more of Jeremias's photography on his photostream.

Happiness and gratitudes



Free on-campus tech support. Those dear Geeks saved my computer from a virus Monday morning. Now I want to bake them a cake or send them an anonymous love letter.

Sweet connections with new blogger friends, like Dawn and Holly.

That I have one genuine spiral curl on the right side of my face.

Giselle Roselli.

My Chicago girl is coming to spend the night on Friday!

Feeling my face relax over the course of a meditation.

And I ran across some free guided meditations which I like.

Looking forward to my dreams as I'm falling asleep.

Being reminded that my thoughts and encouragement are meaningful to others.

My department. Soc/anth here is a small, tight community of some of the coolest people on this campus (in my opinion). And there's always hot water in the office for tea, which is no small perk for a tea addict whose electric kettle just croaked.

Noticing how much more flexible my back has gotten over the past year or so, and being able to do a yoga pose I didn't used to be able to do.

Miniature eclairs.

A three-way Skype date with Erin and Belle. And dancing over Skype.

Guest Post: Cold

By my Chicago girl.

Step out and
lungs gasp but

throat closes tight at the no, no,
no! of the cold,
and for a moment I am breathless.

It slowly slides through all
my layers,
a solid sheet of pin-pricking––

You don't belong here, my
body moans,
and for a moment I understand
that despite my honey-dark hair,
my blue eyes, my fair skin meant to drink in
this thin northern sunlight,
far,
far,
far back,
my family lived in Africa.

And it's quite laughable,
really,
the endeavors of
down and
wool and
leather,


for all never quite make up
for my heritage.

Light-leaky family, Christmas break

365 is on hold briefly while I'm waiting for the replacement for a broken memory card to arrive in the mail. How about...some pictures of my family from Christmas break instead! Since I gave you that teaser of baby Chloe and her dad below. The light leaks were my fault, not the camera's. I accidentally burned off half the roll when I opened the back at the beach, not realizing I'd shot too far for it to rewind.








A little project, just for fun and to see what happens

Send me, by email, some text that would fit on an index card when handwritten. Anything. Your words or someone else's.

And send me an address. Yours or someone else's.

I will randomly match each submitted chunk of text with one of the submitted addreses and write both on the back of an old, randomly chosen 4x6 print of mine. And I will mail it.

My email address is wie.ein.lied[at]gmail[dot]com.

If you feel like tweeting, sharing, or otherwise linking this post, the more the merrier.

Stars lie in piles

I was walking to the train station early on a Saturday morning. Rolling my suitcase behind me, bitterly cold, light fluffy snow falling. One of those days quiet enough for the snowflakes to make it all the way through the atmosphere and the miles of empty air completely intact. Dusted with stars, scarf prickling with stars.




And then I looked at the ground, and I saw that even the couple of inches of snow there were lying so softly on each other that you could still see the perfect, perfectly distinct stars, these unimaginably delicate piles of snow and air and their minute tangled points...


I took these last two with my 50mm lens about three inches from the snow, for an idea of size. You can view any of them big by clicking through and then clicking again.

Minutes in the blizzard

I like in
this wild snow
my body
the riotous feeling of
life pressed against death

and against
all sense how my legs
(fat,muscle bone andblood. health. strength)
carry me onward

the way I can unglove
my numb hand, press it
to my chest
under my coat and
feel it coming back to
life

Happiness and gratitudes


• Greek yogurt. The kind that comes plain with a little compartment of honey. And having a little honey left over to put in my afternoon green tea.

• Watching my niece sleep. Her belly rising and falling and the sound of her breath.

• California.

• The sense of perspective and motivation that I get from my short visits home. (There was a family wedding last weekend.)

• How good sleep and hot tea and hot showers feel when you have a cold.

• Being wonderfully, unapologetically reclusive and unproductive on Friday nights.

• Memories of ice cream in Australia. With Liv at the gas station on our way to the Indian Ocean, splattering incredibly in the wind with Belle and her mum, from the truck at the beach where we had a surfing lesson.

• Classes and chapel being canceled due to the current blizzard. My college hasn't done that in decades!

• Schemes, dreams, first steps, deep breaths.

Little sister lolz:
"Btw about my hipster pictures. Can we have one of me looking out into the sea with the wind in my face, then type some emo caption like 'my emotions eat me alive,' then post it on tumblr and watch the world reblog it without credit to you??? Tempting yes?"

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