Goodbye, July


A mediocre month. It brought Havel, Virginia Woolf, thick fog, and finally employment. Ravens came and left. I spent it rather at the mercy of my brain — back and forth between an obsessive buzzing mood and a numb, heavy, tending-towards-despair. But sometimes it's just a matter of riding it out. If you can continue to get out of bed, eat, go outside, write, those things, if you can just wait for it to subside and protect yourself from (doing) things that would make it worse, then you'll be okay. That's how you can practice hope when you don't feel hope.

Summer classes are over now, thank goodness, and I'm looking forward to this month. August has always been my favorite flavor.

4 comments:

sui 8/02/2011 11:41 AM  

love this post. especially the first paragraph; I know what you mean.

funny, usually july is my flavor, or at least it was last year... but perhaps I'm (re)learning that august is actually my flavor. at least this year.

annelise 8/02/2011 5:46 PM  

July really was mediocre, wasn't it? I know that numb feeling and am still just riding it out too. Let August be better.

smashesthep 8/05/2011 11:01 AM  

I love this. Thanks for sharing, and congratulations on employment.

Holly 8/06/2011 10:03 PM  

sui - Thank you. A creative and flourishing August to both of us.

annelise - Good. Keep hanging in there. <3

smashesthep - Thank you very much! I'm unfortunately waiting through Tuesday to see if I can keep it for more than the couple weeks I've had already. But even if I don't, the income made a big difference.

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